{"id":1129,"date":"2018-06-25T00:00:39","date_gmt":"2018-06-25T06:00:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.melaniebnewman.com\/staging\/9944\/?p=1129"},"modified":"2022-04-18T17:24:12","modified_gmt":"2022-04-18T23:24:12","slug":"which-influences-you-more-circumstances-or-people","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.melaniebnewman.com\/staging\/9944\/which-influences-you-more-circumstances-or-people\/","title":{"rendered":"Which Influences You More? Circumstances or People?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>My daughter was about to experience a less than ideal circumstance and I was concerned!<\/p>\n<p>I was dropping my daughter off for a week-long outdoor youth program. It had been raining, and the forecast called for continued rain throughout the week!<\/p>\n<p>This event was something she had looked forward to for a long time! I commented that I felt badly about her camping in rainy weather all week.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Her reply caused me to pause<\/strong>!<\/p>\n<p>She shrugged her shoulders and said, \u201cMom, that\u2019s ok. <strong>It\u2019s not the weather, it\u2019s the people that make it fun.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>What an insight! I was focusing on the circumstances and wanting everything to be perfect for her so she could have a good experience.<\/p>\n<p>Whereas, she knew that regardless of the weather, the association and friendships she would develop, would be more influential of a positive outcome.<\/p>\n<p>All too often I forget that message and focus on what I think the situation should look like and what I should do to make it successful.\u00a0 Assuming such a responsibility, can easily lead me to feeing unhappy because of things I cannot control, and then I wonder why I am not enjoying the experience!<\/p>\n<h3>My daughter understood, and I was reminded that <strong>circumstances don\u2019t make one happy, but that people and shared experiences have a more powerful effect on the positive, desired outcome.<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>If you have the tendency, like I do, to expect circumstances to make you happy, here\u2019s three simple steps to take:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Remind yourself of the purpose, i.e. to strengthen a relationship.<\/li>\n<li>Ask yourself what action or non-action will best bring the desired result.<\/li>\n<li>Act on that answer.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Learning these simple steps have gone a long way in keeping me from getting bogged down in the less important things and begin to enjoy events rather than feeling upset that all did not go as planned.<\/p>\n<p>So, from a recovering micro-manager, \ud83d\ude42\u00a0 here is my advice to you:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Focus on people<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Remember the purpose<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>Don\u2019t let circumstances determine your happiness.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Sending you much love,<br \/>\n<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-462 alignnone\" src=\"https:\/\/www.melaniebnewman.com\/staging\/9944\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/09\/signature.png\" alt=\"Melanie Newman\" width=\"223\" height=\"73\" \/><\/p>\n<p>P.S. <strong>If you need help overcoming your tendency to allow circumstances to determine your happiness<\/strong>, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.melaniebnewman.com\/staging\/9944\/schedule-a-session\/\">get in touch<\/a> with me and <strong>schedule a SimplyHealed\u2122 energy session<\/strong> today.<\/p>\n<p>It is amazing what <strong>clearing the energy can do in healing and strengthening relationships!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My daughter was about to experience a less than ideal circumstance and I was concerned! I was dropping my daughter off for a week-long outdoor youth program. It had been raining, and the forecast called for continued rain throughout the&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.melaniebnewman.com\/staging\/9944\/which-influences-you-more-circumstances-or-people\/\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1130,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[12,11],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-1129","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-emotional","8":"category-mental","9":"entry"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Which Influences You More? 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